U2 ::: Now Playing

Bad

If you twist and turn away
If you tear yourself in two again
If I could, yes I would
If I could, I would
Let it go
Surrender
Dislocate

If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame

If I could through myself
Set your spirit free
I'd lead your heart away
See you break, break away
Into the light
And to the day

If you should ask then maybe they'd
Tell you what I would say
True colors fly in blue and black
Bruised silken sky and burning flag
Colors crash, collide in blood shot eyes

If I could, you know I would
If I could, I would
Let it go...

This desperation
Dislocation
Separation
Condemnation
Revelation
In temptation
Isolation
Desolation
Let it go

And so fade away
To let it go

But I can't so I won't.

SHRINK RAP ::: Walking the Plank

I can't swim. Really can't. Dunno how. I've never tried to learn either. All I can do is wade. Meaning I'm used to doing things the hard way. It's not that I prefer it, 'cause that would be just plain stupid, but there's a certain satisfaction to getting something done knowing you lacked the necessities to do so in the first place. Masochistic? OK, forget it.

Anyway, that's what I'm faced with right now because I've chosen to walk the plank.

The water looks pretty deep, too. It's no kiddie pool, which is what I'm used to. I managed to take a barge. At least I got that, right?

I'm hoping my pathetic predicament won't make me lose it totally. My barge and I. Crizazy.

Oh and those giant waves will either crush me or carry me to the shore with my sense of self intact. I'm praying for the latter. Although they don't look like they're likely to show me any mercy.

Sorry these analogies are a little too excessive. It's just that I don't feel it would capture the essence of what I'm feeling to write just the plain details.

RIGHT BRAIN ::: Soldiers, Come Quickly

Alice looks so oddly familiar.

SHRINK RAP ::: Precarious

Generally speaking, I'm pretty resolute. Things are easier that way for the lazy screwball that I am and that's how I've chosen to live the so-called adult life. Once in a while, though, I'm forced into a situation that shakes up my foundations. Like right now. It's funny how I always knew this was a shot in the dark from the get-go but I didn't expect it to be like that both ways.

Anyhoo, now I have a cold. I hate it. That's all I'm gonna say. Bring on Monday! Arrrggghhh!!!